If it takes shit to make bliss, well I feel pretty blissfully.
Personally, things have been on the weird side lately. I decided to take a pretty big break from Livejournal (of which I was quite involved), I am with a wonderful and fantastic guy (who also loves me--um, whoa), I'm almost done with school, and I'm working part-time at the school. Oh, and my CD collection seems to be constantly growing, so much so that it never seems quite fully updated.So, at the same time that I enjoy having so much to do--between Friday and tonight, I have cried twice. Now I'm not much of a crier, really. I can't figure out what combination seems to be leading to such a reaction, except horrible cramps for most of today, which messes up my eating and sleeping habits. I walk around consistently tired, both physically and mentally. I don't have anything resembling a real social life, and yet I'm 23. Sometimes I feel like a 30-year old trapped in a 23-year olds body. I feel like I don't do much of what other people in their 20's do: I don't drink (maybe 3-4 times a year), I don't smoke, I don't party, I don't have a ton of friends...and I wonder why I'm the way I am! Give me music, coffee, and my man in any combination and I'm content. (Maybe throw in a good concert too! Heh.) Is it so wrong to be anti-social? I interact with people pretty much all day long with work and school--but except for my weekends and once a week w/the best friend, I really don't get "out" much.
There's still so many things I want to do and/or try; finally getting my AA from a community college, possibly going to law school, start riding horses again, do something more with my piano playing/singing, live in the Bay area. I'm both frightened and excited about what awaits me when I graduate at the end of November. I don't know how many more "new starts" I can take where I've failed. But I'm determined to do something great with my nine months of education and good grades.
Now Playing: Modest Mouse- "Dance Hall"
posted by Miss A @ 6:19 PM
1 Comments:
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